A Hermit at Heart?

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In my younger, early married years, I remember getting that restless feeling when we’d been staring at our own four walls for too many days in a row. It happened a lot, for we were in school and studying and had no money for an active social life. We had friends over on occasion, or went to visit friends, but as most of our friends were also juggling school and family, it didn’t happen as often as I wanted.

Then there were the baby/toddler/preschool years where I thought I’d climb the walls if I couldn’t talk to another adult. So I found ways to do that. A lot. (Thank you, Robin!) But that alone feeling still got the best of me sometimes in spite of our connections with friends, family, and our faith community.

But somewhere along the road, I changed. Suddenly I have no fear of not leaving the house or talking with a real person. I’m perfectly content to crawl into my little shell and stay there. Maybe some of it is that I’ve settled into peace with myself. I no longer find disquiet from within when I am alone. Or perhaps it is the new world of social media and texting, where I know I can interact with people any time I want, day or night, without ever having to leave home or interrupt what another person is doing. Or maybe I’m just a hermit at heart, content with books, movies, and my own imagination. With talking out loud to God, singing at the top of my lungs or dancing through empty rooms.

Thankfully, I have friends who force me out of my growing comfort zone. And it seems the Lord is quite content to prod me from my cozy nest lately as well. But oh, how I look forward to the “at home” days and nights now, cherishing as a gift what I once viewed as torture. And isn’t that the way of all life? What we don’t want, we get, but when we come to want it, it slips through our fingers and disappears.

Is there something in your life that you used to hate (like my “at home” time) that now you wish you had–or had more of?

6 comments on “A Hermit at Heart?

  1. Something I used to hate that I now wish I had more time of…cleaning! I still don’t really enjoy the act of cleaning, but I LOVE being in a perfectly clean place. I just don’t have time for it. I used to be so good about cleaning once a week…I never thought I’d say I miss my weekly cleaning, but I do!

    • I hear you, Melissa! I hate to clean and I’m terrible at it, but for the few years I had a housekeeper, I got used to a clean house. Then I was miserable when I couldn’t make it happen. I’ve found a happy medium now, thanks mostly to an app on my phone called Motivated Mom. It breaks housecleaning and other household chores into small chunks and gives you a checklist every day. Now at least the bathrooms and kitchen get clean (mostly). 🙂

  2. Oh, Anne, I can so relate. I’m a homebody at heart. I love being with people – going to conferences, being with family, church, etc. but I can only take so much, and then I crave the solace of me, my quiet house, and the pup snuggled in the chair beside me. And like you, I know people are only a text or FB post away, so if you ever do get lonely, give me a shout!

    Here’s to hermits everywhere!

    • Yes! I love knowing my friends are just a text or FB post away! This is probably why you and I connected to each other so quickly. Hermits congregate. Well, they congregate alone, but still they congregate. 🙂

  3. I’m learning to find more peace with my winter agoraphobic self. I too am grateful for friends who push me out of my comfort zone–looking forward to a book club tonight in fact.

    But I like my shell. Yes, yes I do. 😀
    ~ Wendy

    • Me, too, Wendy! But I wish I’d have appreciated it more when I had more time to be there! I have a feeling as my nest empties of children, the Lord is going to nudge me out of it more often, too! Enjoy book club! You know I’m envious! 🙂

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