With Fear and Trembling

Pursuing your passion can be a scary thing.

The first writers conference I attended, I took my very first completed novel. It was historical in nature, though not a true romance in content. I had some good reaction—and some bad. Ultimately, the agent who requested it declined to represent me.

So I moved on. I wrote a women’s fiction with an element of suspense. It was a story I knew God put on my heart. It caused me to work through some of my own faith issues as I wrote. I went to another writers conference. Had good feedback, but ultimately, rejections.

Then my husband jumped in the picture. He asked me to write a legal drama. I did. By its merit, I became a Genesis finalist—but it didn’t go any further. I have a couple of requests for this, as well as the knowledge that it is a hot topic, therefore a greater possibility of interest. But while at the conference, I remembered my passion: historical fiction.

I have always loved history. I majored in it in college. I’ve always read that genre first—even sometimes before the classics, which I love. In middle school, I wanted to write historical Christian fiction. That was before Janette Oke. Before that market exploded.

So the question: do I pursue my passion or the market? Historicals abound. The competition for a few spots is fierce. If I found a different outlet, perhaps I could find success more quickly—but at what price?

So after a unbelievable turn of events where I actually have a request for my historical as a romance, I am rewriting, rekindling that passion that brought me to the place of pouring my life into words on a page.

I’m attempting to pursue my passion in spite of the fear that it will never amount to anything more than forgotten files on a languishing laptop.

3 comments on “With Fear and Trembling

  1. Well… if one can’t be passionate about one’s subject… why bother? Reader’s will surely sense the lethargy in something half-heartedly written.

  2. Always a hard question: do you go with what the people want, or do you go with your heart? What best serves the Lord? Only you know.

  3. D’Ann,
    I’ve read parts of Beyond Fear (at Mt Hermon) and can affirm that you have talent. I’m no expert, but I agree with your decision to follow the leading of the Lord and the dictates of your heart. By all means, go back to historical fiction, no matter if the market is crowded. If your experience is anything like mine, you’ll find when you go back to that earlier work and summon up the courage to cut, revise, replot, and in general ramp it up, you’ll be pleased with the results. You mature as a writer by writing. You’ve done just that. In God’s time, your message will be published. And even if it never sees print beyond your own printer, you’ve been changed for the better by writing it. Blessings.

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