. . . it’s off to conference I go—ACFW conference. And, of course, things whip into a frenzy of craziness before time to leave.
I’ve been feeling better about going—maybe because it’s my third conference and I’m beginning to know what to expect, what to focus on. And because I am a Genesis finalist, for the first time I don’t feel like an imposter at a writers conference!
But even with the confidence of being a Genesis finalist, I’m nervous. I wasn’t—until this week. Now the Saturday night awards ceremony looms before me. Will I smile and clap as other people’s names are called and my heart sinks into my shoes? Or will my dreams come true, my name be called, and my stomach churn at the thought of saying even one word in front of 400+ people?
In the long run, I know it doesn’t really matter. If and when the Lord wants my books published, they will get published—somehow. If He just wants to teach me things through the process of writing or if He just wants me to be friends with and pray for other writers, I’m okay with that. I have to be. I can’t make anything happen.
So I’m going this weekend with that thought overriding all the rest. I want to enjoy each moment, each relationship that God brings my way. And if, in the end, it leads to publication, I’ll be thrilled. If not, I’ll still be satisfied.